OMG, Nach Baliye 5 is the mother of all borefests! I never thought I’d be badmouthing a show that had me enthralled in its first two seasons (for purely the performances) and the third season which had some high-voltage performances of another kind, thanks to our feisty Miss BRAwant!

Seeing Karan WAHIyaat compere was enough to bring my blood to a boil! Who can forget the pathetic advances made on Isha during JDJ, only to grope some gori chamdi behind Isha’s back! 😯

As if that wasn’t enough, the producers had to pair this moron with another idiot on screen to ensure all was happy and GAY 😀

I know Mrs. Kundra has just given birth and all, but she would do well to cover up that baby fat COMPLETELY. Plunging necklines ain’t gonna excite anybody now except lil Viaan 😀

Sajid should stick to staying behind the cam. That’s where he weaves his magic best. On screen, he looked dour and ghoulish. I’ve been trying to place why he looks so familiar all of yesterday and today and Eureka! Exactly like that ball of dough sitting in my fridge, all pinched up and ashen :mrgreen:

Terence is like a mad hatter…not because he’s mad or anything!…It’s his mad choice of hats and caps 😆 DID Little Masters might be impressed by his eclectic collection of accessories, but there’s no denying he still looks MAD! 😉

Moving over to the couples, there was a portly, middle-aged gentleman Shilpa likened to Govinda, whom I shudder to watch again, considering how the cellulite was jiggling in every direction imaginable! 😯

Then, there’s Archana’s on-screen brother Vinod, who I never dreamt could get anybody better than Manju. But boy, did he shock me or what by flaunting the original ‘thong’ girl… oops ‘thorn’ girl alias ‘Kaanta Laga’ girl, Shefali on his arm! 😎

Then there’s the original ‘BALL’ywood jodi- Shoaib and Sania, who I fervently hope are more graceful than the balls they hurl 😆

A mentally-challenged couple aside, there’s tin-soldier Naitik and his navya naveli dulhan, for whom I have just 3 words, “GET A ROOM!” 😈

Like every dark cloud has a silver lining, Nach Baliye 5 has its own too, in the form of Dimpy and her ‘Pimpy’. The trademark braying laugh should see the show through! 🙄