‘Tis time to take their case ROYALLY!

The UK should learn a thing or two from the Orange Nation. Iโ€™m tired of seeing that grumpy, frumpy, stumpy woman ๐Ÿ˜† rule the roost for soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo soooooooooooo sooooooooooo looooooong. She became queen even before my parents were born ๐Ÿ˜ฏ Today they have grandchildren and I think these will spawn kids of their own ๐Ÿ˜€ but the Iron Maiden will continue holding Britain in her viselike grip ๐Ÿ˜†

Speaking of Orange Nation, I had no inkling they had a ‘second’ Royal Family headed by Queen Beatrix who very magnanimously relinquished her position to…hold your breath….
…………………….not the pauper in the street, not the pimp running that sleazy brothel in the prostitution capital of the world, not even to Tusshaar Kapoor/ Uday Chopra ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ….but to her own son!!! ๐Ÿ™„ And the mediaโ€™s in a tizzy over this???!!!??? ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

Unti April 30, 2013, I was under the impression that the Netherlands was ruled by an immigrant family of Indian origin. I vividly remember being fed a fantastic story, about four years ago, of a girl child catapulting her folks into the royal league, merely because of the order in which her brother and she were born!

You see, the Dutch, sloshed by all the santra, ๐Ÿ˜† are of the opinion that ONLY AND ONLY WHEN a woman bears a MALE heir BEFORE producing a baby bear, the imperial tag is hers for the keeping. A woman who has a daughter first and then a son- effectively the same thing IMHO, is destined only for weeping! Same-sex families, youโ€™re not even in the running!!!

Where does that leave poor Princess…er…Queen Maxima? ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

Anyway, while the Dutch were oohing and aahing over the nationโ€™s new princess of exotic lineage, the family got so swept away by all the adulation and fanfare that they forgot basic etiquette. The impudent royals imagined they had a copyright on procreation. They began feverishly recollecting our National Pledge, ‘All Indians are brothers and sisters.’ How then could DH impregnate his wife without the royal blessings??? ๐Ÿ˜ฏ ๐Ÿ˜ฏ ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

Clearly, they forgot the tweaked version invented by every Indian school-going adolescent. ‘All Indians are my brothers and sisters….EXCEPT ONE!’ ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

They refused to part with a single Euro from the state treasury and make a congratulatory call to the not-so-royal-tummy where new life was beginning to bloom for the first time. They eventually did. When the commoner called on His Majesty, The King’s Birthday!!! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

The Naarangis also contributed to berangi in the lives of their not-so-fortunate brethren by making the wildest of speculations and proclamations. Apparently, a woman is incapable of determining if she’s pregnant or not before the 40-day mark ๐Ÿ˜ฏ Obviously, I wouldn’t expect them royals to resort to using such lowly methods as an HPT kit to confirm pregnancy!

It’s such a tragedy that a woman’s worth has to be judged by whether she can bear kids or not. To add insult to the injury, the gender and the order matter too!!! ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

Hail Queen Maxima, who with your brood of three gorgeous princesses, should bring to task these fake royals and make them kiss your asses! ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

BELOW: The REAL Royals: